Damnit, I've lost my "happiness". Since yesterday I have felt mean, pissed, frustrated and sad. Not quite sure why it started yesterday, though I do know what it's about. I'm back to a place where I feel like I have no control over anything in my life. Everything in my house if falling apart and I can't get anyone to do anything about any of it. I spend each day at work preparing things that the lawyers either ignore, cancel or forget about, even when these things are supposedly very important to them. My back and leg problem doesn't seem to be really getting any better -- even though I have good days, I still have so many bad days that it really is reminding me of last time and I'm thinking we're going to end up with the same result, just after more time and money have been wasted. And now the one thing I was feeling a tiny bit of control over, getting back to losing weight, has been sidelined by Dr. Perry, who called today to move my physical from next month (by which point I was on target to have lost 10 pounds since I last saw him) to this Friday, by which point I will be exactly where I was when he last saw me since I've had to spend the last week working off the two weekends in Columbus. So I'm doomed to the lecture yet again, even though I'm actually back on track. My only positive thought from all of this is that at least the physical will be done when I'm already in a bad frame of mind, so this time he won't be ruining a good one, like he has done to me several times, which is devastating. I just hope that by this time next week, Perry will be in the past (and not in the near future for awhile), I'll have AC and heat, and maybe even a working cable box in my bedroom. And maybe even a LWL meeting to look forward to. Please, please, please!